Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Strengthening Marriage

Ken and I are taking a recently created "Strengthening Marriage" class in our stake. The stake presidency decided to invite all of the bishops and their wives to take it this first round, with the stake presidency and their wives. It will be every Sunday evening. Ken had other obligations this week, so I attended alone, then "gave" him the class after- altering only slightly the presentation! Hopefully, he'll be able to attend from now on. It's quite a commitment for these bishops: they come running in with their hair blowing back(those who haven't lost their hair yet). Their wives are sitting there, waiting- probably haven't seen their husbands that day except when they were up on the stand during Sacrament meeting. The stake presidency felt it would be good for them to experience the class. Then they'll know what they're recommending. So, here's what I learned: *The brain is neutral. You decide whether a thought is positive or negative. We need to choose to focus on the good in our spouse; not the negatives. Couples having trouble invariably are choosing to focus on negative. Accentuate the positive; eliminate the negative. . . . . . . . . . . . . *Responding to hysteria with hysteria only heightens hysteria. . . . . . . . . . . . *Want the highest degree of celestial kingdom? President Kimball said that only those couples who have learned to love each other so much that neither death nor hell can separate them will achieve it. We were asked to write a list of five character traits or qualities that we love in our spouse. Here's my list: . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 1. sense of humor 2. kind 3. gentle 4. gentleman 5. loving 6. self-disciplined 7. hard worker 8. goal-oriented 9. clean 10.satisfiser 11.decisive 12.confident 13.spiritual 14.complimentary 15.secure (financial; socially- I know he won't embarrass me in public) 16.helpful 17.appreciative 18.consistent 19.patient 20.loves learning . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Challenge: Commit to only entertain positive thoughts of spouse. So, there you have it: Class One.

7 comments:

Shonna said...

I love it! Thanks for the notes.

Brian said...

One comment on number 15. I think I remember once when he may have embarrassed at least some people in the family. Think about exploding blenders and family prayer :) Sounds like a nice class for the busiest of marriages.

Kristen Mackrory said...

Thanks for sharing! What great advice. I take your challenge! :) (It sounds a lot like the one Elder Eyring gave in his talk 2 weeks ago.)

James and Tricia Thomas said...

That sounds like a great class! I love that they are making all the Bishops take it!:) Now they can recommend it!

Joan Morris said...

Thanks for sharing. What wonderful tips. Our stake president also told us to "Pray for the love to see only the good in our spouses and children." What sound advice. We need to try to see them through Heavenly Father's eyes.

Natalie Sue said...

Thanks for this post! My good friend has to give a talk on strengthening marriages in church, and she asked if I had any ideas. I loved that quote from President Kimball, so I'm going to give that to her! I love that lds.org has these manuals online.. at least i hope so!

The Allens said...

You know my mom, Cindy, teaches that class in her stake and has raved and raved about that manual. She says it is the perfect combination of 'inspired' and 'researched' information. Thanks for sharing. Between chatting with her after she teaches it and reading your blog after you attend it, maybe I can learn a little something. --Ali